The Science of Selling myself Short

The Science of Selling myself Short

Went and visited with my Dad yesterday afternoon. Erin had plans to go to the gym with some friends so to ensure I didn’t drive myself nuts at home Jones’n for a workout I decided to go hang with Pops. Had a nice visit and I pitched some ideas I had and he proceeded with the inevitable yet welcome pep-talk that I needed. He’s good at those. To summarize the conversation he proved once again that I always come up with these big ideas and never ever follow through with anything. Case in point… 2 weeks ago I was all stoked on starting to play tennis and join a USTA team. Haven’t done it. I told myself I was going to finally finish up my painting that has been half done for the last year. Haven’t done it. This all came from the part of the conversation that we were having about what kind of stuff I can do outside of my day job to fulfill my dreams of all the things I am passionate about. Such as… Ever since I lost my weight I have had this huge burning desire to take my success and knowledge and put it good use and become some type of trainer, coach, or like health/nutrition advisor to people. A “Fitness Consultant” if you will. Every time the thought gets stirred up I come up with 5000 reasons why I shouldn’t do it or reasons I can’t do it. Basically I am terrified to commit to anything. I think I fear the possibility of failing. I fear the commitment and time things take to materialize. Rome wasn’t built in a day. But in our instantly-gratified world…I think I expect things to just happen exactly how and when I want them too. This is a huge major flaw that has plagued my life for so long. I have lately been doing some digging around in my head wondering why? I think the biggest thing that holds me back is the thought of failing like I said before. I am fortunately (and also unfortunately) surrounded by people in my life that have succeeded in exactly what they set out to do. Erin went through everything it took to be a dental hygienist… hated it…prayed…found her calling… worked her butt off to switch careers and now is the happiest person in the world being an elementary school teacher. My mom was a teacher, went back to school to be an assistant principle, and never looked back. My dad joined the navy at 18 to get out of his small town dead-end life to pursue a future for his family. Served his 6 years, went to school, worked, had me, and provided an amazing living for us all. My sister was one of the most successful soccer players in our area, played in college, won a CAA title, got a degree she wanted, fell in love with Utah, and one day took the biggest leap of faith and moved out to Park City to chase her dreams and loves every minute of it. So the 4 closest people in my life have all at certain points given everything up to pursue a better life, or a deeper passion and have all been incredibly successful. Then I look back at myself… and see how in just about every “big-decision” moment of my life I have done what others have wanted me to do (or so I thought) or taken the easy road. I tend to only pursue things where maybe I know someone who can help me out, or follow a group of friends (Radford), or just simply take the road WELL traveled. Followed the status-quo I guess. I have never once just said F*** it and jumped head first into something. I really do think it’s because I am terrified of being the “one that tried and failed” I know I talk about it a lot but I really do feel a major calling to something fitness related. Not only have I lost 130lbs. Helped Erin lose 90. Helped spark a healthy lifestyle in both of our families, but I have also helped a friend of mine get in really good shape. I think at one point he told me he gained 5lbs of muscle but lost 4 inches on his waste through working out with me. He dreamed of running a half-marathon and so I helped him get on a plan and a routine and he has stuck with it and his race is this Saturday. Not that I am claiming that from him… hes the one who has sacrificed and kept up with the training, but I feel like I was part of the spark and the start that got him rolling. I have helped a lady at my work lose 17lbs in the last 2 weeks and have helped her totally re-invent her diet from daily stops at Hardee’s and buying honey buns from the snack machines to a whole-foods healthy diet and all she does it tell me how much better she feels! I have all the tools and the EXPERIENCE that a lot/most physical trainers or nutrionalists cant say they have. They may have the book knowledge and could crush me on an anatomy exam… but I actually DID it. Sometimes experience is far more valuable then reciting facts. I have also enjoyed the most amazing highs, and the darkest deepest lows that some experience in a weight loss journey. So why don’t I pursue something???? Because I could right now list out a bunch of reasons I could say its too hard. School and courses and certifications or are too expensive, I would have to read, and study and work hard and take exams, and once (if) I finished all that…. I would have to join the world of all the other bagillion trainers out there completing for clients. I would have to figure out where I would conduct my work from. You can’t always just say you will meet at Mt. Trashmore for a workout. Where would I conduct business? How would I charge people? Would I charge people? Where and how would I find people to work with…. All these thoughts combine together in my brain and conclude…. Ahh its not worth it. Way too hard. Screw it. I don’t want to get to be 55yrs old and have all these things I WISHED I would have done. Ben Franklin tried to make a light bulb 2000 times before he got it. I think I would try something for .2000 times before I would give up. I hate it. I don’t want to be like this. It’s pathetic. I refuse to continue to be Matt Simeone the quitter. I want to be Matt Simeone the winner. Another thing that holds me back big time is that I tend to quit or give up if I am not the absolute best at something. I hate to lose. Case in point… Crossfit. I am probably the most obsessed Crossfit enthusiast who has never done Crossfit. Why? It’s Expensive. It’s hard. I will probably not ever be as good as Rich Froning. Confession: I am terrified to paint anything that is not a Paint-By-Number. Why? Because I know I will probably never be able to paint like Thomas Kinkade. So why even bother? I would probably make a fool of myself and it would end up looking more like a Picasso. Why do I set myself to the standards of other people. Why can I not just accept the fact that some people have unique gifts and freakish abilities in some things. Why can’t I be satisfied with what Matt Simeone can do. Maybe its all connected. Maybe its because I feel like my bests or the things I succeed in get trumped by CAA titles, 4.0’s thoughout Master’s programs, My dad’s career successes. MUST STOP JUDGING MYSELF BASED ON OTHER PEOPLE!

So to sum it all up I have perfected the science of selling myself short. Bill Gates, Warren Buffet, Mark Zuckerberg, Richard Branson, Michael Jordan, Rich Froning, Thomas Kinkade, and Ben Franklin. They all have one thing in common. They set a goal. Worked as hard as possible and did everything they could, gave everything they had, sacrifice everything including pride, and did not take failure or the idea of failing as an option. I must learn from this. I must stop making excuses. Stop worrying. Take a plunge. Go all in. As Mike McDermott (Matt Damon) said in one of my favorite movies ever… “you cant lose what you don’t put in the middle, but you can’t win much either” – Rounders.

Whoa. Not where I thought this blog was going to go. Looks like I made up for not writing yesterday. So anyway… anyone wanna be my first true fitness client??? J