Second times a charm: Therapy
Just a quick update this afternoon. I wasn’t sure where I
was going to take today’s blog. I had some ideas. But I need to process some
thoughts before I felt ready to write about them. So anyway yesterday after
work I had my first….second Therapy session. The first time I tried it back in November it
was not good. I don’t really feel like I was ready to talk then. I had just
admitted all this to my families and I guess myself for that matter. So it was
just too early in the process to jump right in. The other thing I didn’t really
like about the last one was he seemed very ready to get me on a medication. I am
not a big fan of medication. Yes I will pop an advil if I have a headache bad
enough. But I try to avoid them. So meeting with this guy for 1 hour and him
immediately coming to the conclusion that I need Zoloft seemed a bit rushed to
me. This lady is not a doctor so she cant directly prescribe anything which I like.
I am sure she will be able to recommend medications to my PCP or something but
we didn’t get into all that. This time around I just felt 100000x more
comfortable. The last guy’s office was super busy and papers and books
allllllllllllllll over the place and it guess I just never felt good in there.
This lady’s office was smaller, one entire wall of her office was a full height/width
window looking out at a pond, which brought in a comfortable amount of natural
light given the overcast day. She didn’t have any other lights on in the office
other then a weird “orb” shaped light that slowly changed colors. Probably some
crazy mood light thing but I found myself always looking at it. Specifically
during the purples and greens. Not sure why. The office also had an incredibly
strong scent plug in or something. It reminded me of Sea Breeze or Ocean Walk
from yankee candle. It was also very neat. She didn’t have a traditional desk. So
I think it helped that it didn’t feel like an office. Just big couches, a
couple chairs and bookshelfs and her Macbook Air that she used to work with. She
is very soft spoken and calming. Like she matched the feel of her office perfectly.
Calming, neat, clean, safe I guess. I was really nervous about working with a
woman I wont lie. I felt like it was going to be straight up Soprano
style. She actually grew up in Little
Neck and went to FC. So we shared a nice common ground right off the bat. So
anyway it started out good. She asked me how I wanted to start the process and
basically said we could just dive right in and I could just start talking… or
she could begin by asking questions and hopefully prompting a discussion from
them. We did the ladder. It was nice. Because I had no idea where to start if I
had too. Some questions I answered a simple yes or no but others sparked lengthy
discussions. It was pretty much an overview of the general issues I am facing
but I am hoping/excited to begin to more specifically dig into each one. She
even agreed to try her best to read this blog. I told her I totally understand
she probably has a ton of other patients and a life outside of work and a
family and stuff… but I think the only way a therapist would really be able to
help is if they read it. It is an incredibly detailed outline of my life and struggles.
It is so hard to remember everything once a week for an hour so I think this
would be incredibly helpful. I guess you could say it could give her a massive
head start on decoding my past and present.
Anyway… just a quick update today.
Also I would like to put out a major prayer request for
those prayer warriors out there… My mom’s Mom is in the hospital after being
rushed there last night for some heart problems I think. My mom got a phone
call yesterday around 4pm and by 8pm she was in the air flying to up Mass. So
be praying that it is nothing serious and for healing. And for the family to receive
peace through all this.
And also Pray for Erin. She has been slowly developing a
cold or sinus infection this week so pray for speedy recovery!
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